Mention the word diving and some might think of Cristiano Ronaldo or our very own Didier Drogba – they’ve certainly both been guilty of it and mud sticks – or at least it does if you spend half your time throwing yourself at it. But, to be fair to Ronaldo, that’s an area of his game he’s addressed and Utd are certainly reaping the benefits. That lad can score a goal or two when he’s on his feet apparently. Funnily enough, Drogba found the same last season when he sorted out his imbalance problem although as I’ve mentioned before, he seems to have had the odd disagreement with that sniper again this season.

However, one name you wouldn’t expect the media to mention in the same sentence as the word ‘dive’ is football’s very own saviour, Mr Moral Code himself, Saint Gerrard. So, to see such a travesty in print begs the question ‘who would dare to level such scandalous accusations at football’s very own shining light’? Surely it’s a very brave man who would risk life and limb at the hands of ‘the best supporters in the country’ to label the Golden Boy not just a diver, but a “cheat”. Well actually it was Graham Poll, but let’s face it, it’s well overdue.

In his latest quest to get his name up in lights the numerically challenged ex-referee stated “It gives me no satisfaction to name and shame him, but I was disappointed by Steven Gerrard last weekend. I have seen Gerrard go to ground too easily before and always thought how silly he looks, because he is not very good at it. When he went down in the penalty area as Brad Friedel slid towards him last Sunday it was obvious he was trying to deceive Alan Wiley into awarding Liverpool an early penalty.” Now, while I’m neither surprised that Saint Stevie of Me has been spotted tripping over air, or that Mr I-Love-The-Spotlight-Poll has put his mug in the headlines again, what does surprise me is that Chelsea’s favourite ref has finally said something I agree with.

Of his selectively-sighted ex-colleague, Poll goes on to say “Wiley, one of the best and most experienced referees around (is he sure?), would not have been fooled by such an obvious act of simulation, but his performance disappointed me too because instead of awarding Blackburn Rovers a free kick and cautioning Gerrard, he awarded a goal kick and ran away. As a result, Gerrard was then given licence to carry on with his antics again and again.” Oh, so you mean that “most experienced ref” chose not to act on “such an obvious act of simulation” (aka cheating)? Surely not? Surely Liverpool wouldn’t get away with such blatant cheating? I mean, it’s not as if you’d disallow a perfectly good goal against them in a derby just because it was their keeper who cocked up is it Mr Poll? Or admit it seven years later once you’d retired eh?

It’s pretty amusing that a ref, once criticised for failing to book players for blatant diving despite turning down penalty appeals in the 2006 World Cup, should now be saying “divers….who intend to deceive the referee – are cheats.” And “to be branded guilty of cheating…..would highlight the practice for what it is”. You wouldn’t do such a thing yourself would you Mr I’ll-Teach-Them-A-Lesson Poll? But still, when it comes to giving out awards for hypocrisy, I think even the two-faced Poll is pipped to the post on this occasion by the subject of his latest outburst. That award has to go to Mr ‘all other footballers except me, especially foreigners are cheats’ Gerrard and on this occasion at least, Mr Poll has got it spot on.

Filed under: Rants