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CHELSEA vs United: The Show Must Go On

Ok, I know the game isn’t happening now but since I’d already done the whole pre-match interview with Scott the Red from the Republik of Mancunia, it’s only right and proper I still air his views – besides, it’ll be out of date by the time we do get to play now, so here we go:

The Chelsea Blog: Right Scott, I know you’ve been pretty vocal in the past when it’s a Chelsea player stepping out of line, so I imagine you wouldn’t be too impressed with Rooney these days?
Scott The Red: He’s ruined for me. I was one of the many reds who bought all the nonsense about him wanting to spend his career at United, loving the club and kissing the badge. I want him to do well, because if he does well, United have a better chance, but I’ll never feel the way about him that I did. He’s a top footballer and I’m glad he signed now, but after all the slatings I’ve given other players who are meant to be loyal, like Terry and Gerrard (I know, different, because they actually came up through the ranks), messing their clubs around, there’s no way I can pretend it’s anything like acceptable what Rooney did. What was probably the most sickening thing of it all was him trying to con the press in to thinking that him and Fergie had been rowing behind the scenes, with all that “I’m not injured” business – we’d all seen him icing his ankle in the dugout at the Reebok after being subbed off an hour in to the game. Bang out of order.

TCB: You’re not wrong there but like you said, he signed in the end. Bet you’re gutted you lost such a loyal servant in Tevez though eh?

STR: Ha! We’ll never know what went on behind the scenes, but after scoring 5 goals in his last season, there was no way United were going to fork out what was being asked. At the time, he claimed he wouldn’t even talk to Liverpool out of respect for United fans – and then signed for City! After forking out a load of money to run that small time Tevez poster campaign, that sorry bunch look more ridiculous than ever with Tevez admitting he wanted to leave just 12 months after signing. Hilarious. He says he’s homesick. We’ll see how homesick he is when he signs for a top European club in the summer… .

TCB: Media circus aside, how do you think your season’s going?

STR: It’s going well. Top of the league with a game in hand. Considering we’ve been without our “best player” Rooney, it’s not bad going. I’m looking forward to him hitting form and Antonio Valencia returning. Should step it up a gear then. Our football has been poor at times, the dropped points at Fulham and Everton are so annoying, but we’ve picked up some good results and played some nice football too.

TCB: Like us, you’re out of the Carling cup and drawn Liverpool in the FA cup, what do you think you’ll come out of this season with trophy-wise?

STR: You can never predict knock out competitions. I think we’ll win the league though. I say that every season, I’m not going to stop now! Can’t wait for Liverpool in the cup though. Last year we lost to Leeds, which was so painful for the fans, so hopefully the boss has learnt from that.

TCB: Confident As ever! What about your players, do you think you any that particularly stand-out so far this season?

STR: Vidic has been brilliant. Berbatov is the top scorer in the league. Nobody has more assists than Nani in the league. They’re probably the best three. Although I’ve really enjoyed watching Rafael this season. He’s starting to look the business.

TCB: Didn’t really narrow it down to one there but if you had to give one we should watch out for, who would it be?

STR: Rooney is looking for a game to sort himself out. After taking that awful penalty against Arsenal, hopefully he’ll feel like he has a point to prove.

TCB: Which Chelsea player will your players be keeping an eye on?

STR: Drogba is always a potential threat, even if it’s just for 30 seconds out of 90 minutes.

TCB: Ha ha, I bet our form had you worried at the start of this season though?

STR: God yes. It got to a point where it didn’t look like it would matter if United started playing, because how were we ever going to make up those 5 points? Never in a million years envisaged the total collapse.

TCB: Yeh, I know the feeling! You must be pretty confident of a result the way we’ve played lately though right?

STR: No. It doesn’t matter how we’re playing, it doesn’t matter what’s at stake, it doesn’t matter how well we play on the day, we never get a result at Stamford Bridge. Obviously I’d absolutely love us to win but we’d have to win at your place a few times before I started feeling confident about it happening ahead of match day.

TCB: Go on then, give us a prediction.

STR: 1-1.

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